Awards are fun to get!

Thank you, Mom, for this blog award! I would like to give it to my sister, Ashlyn, for her blog Captured by Beauty. She has a gift for "capturing beauty" with her photographs and then using them to turn our eyes to the beauty of the Lord.

Treasure Lost

Today I was working on memorizing John 16. As I glibly recited the verses I have already learned, I was struck by verses 6-7: "But because I have said these things unto you, sorrow hath filled your heart. Nevertheless I tell you the truth; it is expedient for you that I go away: for if I go not away, the Comforter will not come unto you; but if I depart, I will send him unto you." God had to take something away from the disciples, something that they loved dearly - Himself, before he could give them an even greater blessing - the Comforter, the Holy Spirit - who would be with them every second, "guiding them into all truth." Yet the disciples, not realizing the intended blessing, were sorrowful, clinging to what they already had and loved. They didn't understand that momentarily painful loss was going to result in eternally satisfying joy ("and your joy no man taketh from you.") They had to lose in order to gain.

I think of how many times this has been true in my life. God has taken something I loved from me, only to give me something He knew I would love even more. While I thought my heart would break from aching loss, He whispered, "Child, just wait and see what I have for you now. Eye has not seen nor ear heard, nor could your heart ever imagine what I have prepared for you." And sure enough, blessings that I could never have imagined have become mine, gifts from The Perfect Giver, precious treasures that would have never been given if he had not seen fit to take.

Lord, help me to trust you. Help me to look beyond this moment and all its glitter and remember the best is yet to come.

Coffee, Prayer, and Possibilities

I don't know about you, but my new year's resolutions always feel a lot like the picture above - impossibly long! Being the overachiever that I am, I always have a million plans, goals, dreams, summits to surpass, and obstacles to overcome. In fact, forget about my new year's resolutions - the pic probably just as accurately represents my daily to-do list! (Ask my mom - I exaggerate only slightly!) So, this year, I decided to try to keep my goals down so that I would have a little more chance of reaching them. I don't know if I actually reached any of my goals from last year but I did make progress towards them. A few notable achievements from 2009:

• Lost 15 pounds
• Visited 3 of my college friends and my sister
• Memorized John 14, 15 and part of 16
• Read through the Bible
• Completed 2o hours of course work towards my MAT with a 3.9 GPA (while simultaneously teaching full time, taking piano lessons, and serving as the church pianist)
• Made it through my first year as a teacher and half way through my second (now, if you could have met some of my students, you would know this IS an accomplishment!)
• Passed the GACE basic skills test and Content tests 1 & 2
• Read 5 educational books (including Ike, For Whom the Bell Tolls, and War and Peace)

I probably did some other stuff too, but this is what most stands out in my mind. It is always a good feeling to look back and see that I actually DID accomplish some things contrary to what it might seem. Now, for this year...(deep breath).........drum roll please!!

Oh wait - little side note before I begin - I always like to structure my goals into four main groups following Luke 2:52 "And Jesus increased in wisdom and stature and favor with God and man." OK, without further adieu - my Goals 2010!

Wisdom

• Be faithful in piano practice and make lots of progress
• Graduate with my MAT
• Read at least 12 new educational books
• Practice flute at least 1 time per week
• Work on my needlework at least 1 time per week
• Work through my Piano repertoire listening list

Stature

• Lose more weight and get in shape
• Faithfully take a multi vitamin
• Improve my posture

Favor with God

• Read through the Bible
• Memorize John 16 (the rest of it), Galatians, and Ephesians

Favor with Man

• Keep in touch with my friends
• Listen to Matt read at least 1 time per week
• Spend more time investing in my family

So, there they are. As the year unfolds, I am sure that I will face challenges both expected and unexpected that will threaten to get me discouraged and off track. However, this year, I want to learn from a sermon our pastor preached and: Not judge my future by my past or present, See the Possibilities in the Problems, and Remember that my Outlook determines my Outcome. With a positive, unwavering attitude and God's grace, I am sure that I will have a successful and productive year come what may! In the words of my new favorite coffee mug, "With enough coffee and prayer, I can do anything!" :)

P.S. - If all else fails, I can always throw my resolutions out the window and claim as my mantra the cartoon below. You know it's true! :)

The Gratitude Attitude

"In everything give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you."
~ 1 Thessalonians 5:18

This Thanksgiving, I feel like I have more than ever to be grateful for:

*A good job in a struggling economy - and a job I enjoy, with great co-workers, an amazing boss, and a Christian atmosphere
*A caring, supportive family to whom I can come home every day and be warmed, comforted, and surrounded with their love
*A beautiful home, plentiful, delicious food, and an abundance of material possessions
*The time, resources, opportunity, and ability to continue pursuing my passion for music
*The opportunity to worship the Lord as church pianist
*Wonderful, caring friends whose love transcends the boundaries of time and distance
*And of course, a loving, forgiving, never-failing Savior-Father-Friend who is Always There

The list could continue forever - blessings large and small to count and cherish, for which to lift my voice in thankfulness.

This time of year it is so easy to be thankful. Time off work, holiday festivities, pantries and tables bursting with delicious food, happiness, fun, fellowship, friends, family, laughter, beautiful decorations, barely-restrained-childlike-anticipation, heartwarming carols old and new ringing from houses and hearts everywhere, and so much more make this season - starting with Thanksgiving and continuing through Christmas - truly the most wonderful time of the year.

So, as I think about giving thanks in all things, with belly full, face glowing, and hands and heart warm, it seems pretty easy. But then I wonder....what about January.....bleak and unadorned by holiday magic.....will I be thankful then? Because having a thankful spirit is not just for Thanksgiving when it is relatively easy to give thanks. It is for rainy Mondays, bleak Januarys, heart wrenching, trial-filled days and days of motonous sacrifice, for valleys and plains, as well as the peaks. It is those days that really test whether I have a "gratitude attitude." A thankful heart can transform the bleakest day, the most painful experience into a beautiful act of worship. It is not circumstances that determine our destiny but rather our response, our attitude, our outlook. "Your attitude determines your altitude."

So, this holiday season as I lift my hands and heart to praise God for all that He has blessed me with, I also whisper a prayer that come January, I will make my own heart magic as I choose to give thanks in ALL things.

"...he who has a glad heart has a continual feast [regardless of circumstances]."
~ Proverbs 15:15 (amplified)

Trifles

All weeks are crowded with eventful trifles;
at least we in our blindness call them trifles,
although we are constantly discovering their importance
and being constantly astonished over them.
(from Ester Reid Yet Speaking by Isabella Alden)

Trifles. Little things. Why are the little things sometimes the hardest? This week I have been struggling, getting bogged down in the monotony of life, finding it hard to live inspired and energetic. Many days, while I do not live at the height of inspiration and motivation that I want to, I am excited about life, motivated to strive for excellence in what I do, to find ways to go to that next level in at least Something that day. But then there are the OTher days - like this week - days when I am tired, bored, when I cannot find the deeper meaning, the inner inspiration to reach higher, push harder, live. laugh. love. MORE. I lose that zest, zeal, zip for life, and daily living becomes a chore - a bore. But the truth is...life is made of little things - lots of them - they are what will define the majority of my life. Little things...listening to a student with all the love and compassion I can muster as she shares with me her tragic weekend (in which she didn't get enough sleep, lost her DSI tournament, and didn't get to have that party - all tragedies in the mind of a 5th grader.); trying to make phonics flashcard drills just a little less monotonous by pretending we are relaying a secret code through the blends; hugging a little brother as he greets me eagerly when I arrive home; trying to make the house a little more of a haven by whisking away some of the clutter; laughing as a little sister sassily marches out in *quite an outfit*; pushing myself to squeeze in just a bit more practice time, to play that scale just a bit faster, to play the Chopin with even more passion; sipping a cup of fragrant coffee as I attempt to finish that paper; all of these and many, many MORE little things that fill each day are what define my life - are what define ME. And yet seeing their significance and seizing their potential is difficult. At least some days. But that is what I yearn to do - to grasp those little moments, those little things, and squeeze every drop of joy and passion from them.
Oswald Chambers said:

Discipleship is built entirely on the supernatural grace of God. Walking
on the water is easy to impulsive pluck, but walking on dry land as a
disciple of Jesus Christ is a different thing....We do not need the grace
of God to stand crises; human nature and pride are sufficient--we can face
the strain magnificently; but it does require the supernatural grace of
God to live twenty-four hours in every day as a saint, to go through
drudgery as a disciple, to live an ordinary, unobserved, ignored existence
as a disciple of Jesus. It is inbred in us that we have to do exceptional
things for God; but we have not. We have to be exceptional in the
ordinary things, to be holy in mean streets, among mean people, and this
is not learned in five minutes.

Yet that is just what I want to do - be exceptional in the ordinary things, in the little things, in the dailyness of life. The Trifles are what we must overcome - not the Mountains, not even the valleys, but the plains, filled with miles and miles of sameness, of dailyness, of little things. And yet the trifles also give us the greatest opportunity to Shine, to be a consumed candle that keeps burning, burning, burning, burning, yet does not give out. Trifles = Opportunites to be Exceptional.

20 Random things about ME!!

1. What is your favorite thing to snack on while you're blogging?

Hmmm excellent question. Actually, I have done such a little bit of blogging that I haven't actually snacked yet while blogging!! :D But in general I love bagels, cinnamon sugar toast, honey sunshine with walnuts and fruit and soy milk, and chocolate soy milk...These are a few of my favorite snacks! :)


2. What is one thing you wouldn't want to live without?

I have to pick just 1?? Impossible! I would not want to live without: my piano, my wardrobe, coffee, chocolate


3. Beach, Mountains or Farm? Where would you live if you had a choice?

Mountains from October to February, Beach from March to September

4. What's your least favorite chore/household duty?

ironing!!


5. Who do people say you remind them of?

A drop dead gorgeous super model of course! :D Or a hollywood actress! J/K lol Actually, I don't know just random people that they know and I don't. Which always makes me nervous because I don't know if the person they are talking about is a gorgeous belle or a hideous monster!! It is quite disturbing and disconcerting. I always hope for the best...but you never really know!


6. Prefer parties and socializing or staying at home with the fam?

Hmmm depends. When I feel bouncy, bubbly, crazy and brimming with mischief and fun, I enjoy going to parties - when I know people at them to hang out with. Most of the time though I prefer to snuggle up with some of my little siblings on the couch with a nice cup of coffee and one of my favorite books, movies, or TV shows. I also love to play family games. Of course this all depends on whether or not I even have time to indulge in anything enjoyable!! Most of the time I am slaving away on practice or schoolwork.

7. What's your all time favorite movie?

Probably Anne of Green Gables/Avonlea

8. Do you sleep in your make up or remove it like a good girl every night?

I am ashamed to admit that I fall in the bad girl category most every night and simply fall into bed in exhaustion without washing my face appropriately. I am always repenting of this horrible sin and making new resolutions which involve detailed face washing marathons including masks and preventive anti-aging treatments, acne removal, etc., etc., but alas I am afraid that all my resolutions go out the window once bedtime rolls around!!

9. Do you have a hidden talent or a deep desire to learn something that you've never had a chance to learn? What is it?

I have always wanted to learn ballet, gymnastics, and figure skating, but I am afraid I do not have any hidden talents in these areas - just the desire to learn them!!


10. What's one strange thing you're really good at?

Ummm I can't really think of anything!! I am bad at lots of strange random things - like I can't snap my fingers for the life of me!!!


11. What first attracted you to your spouse?

Nothing - considering I am not married yet!! :D


12. What is something you love to smell?

fresh apple pie, cinnamony anything, soapy fresh showered smell, coffee!!


13. Tell something about you that you know irritates people.

Practicing 2 hours a day!! It drives my family absolutely crazy!! I also tend to over obsess/ analyze things.


14. When you have extra money (HA!) what's the first thing you think to do with it?

Go shopping!! Clothes, shoes, jewelry, and purses!!!!!

15. Are you a silent laugher or a loud laugher? What makes you laugh the hardest?

Loud laugher. Mostly when I am too tired and stressed - then I just laugh regardless!!

16. Where is your favorite place to shop?

Kohls, J C penneys, Bath and Body Works, Barnes and Noble


17. What's one thing you'd do more often if you had more time?

Have fun!! :D lots of things - exercise, sleep, read, play family games, watch TV, go shopping, go to the library, I don't know - everything!!! Time is the missing ingredient in my life!! lol


18. Are you a big spender or frugal?

Um a big spender...i guess?? I like to buy clothes and things I want but I also go through long periods without buying anything. Just depends how much money I have and how many things I can't live without!!


19. Who is your favorite character of all time (from a movie or book)? (Can't be real)

Definitely Anne with an E from Anne of Green Gables. I am definitely a kindred spirit with her - maybe even her twin!!


20. Would you want to be famous?

Only sometimes. Mostly not. But I would love to be rich!!! :)

Need a brake??

I do!! Sometimes it is hard to tell how to get one admidst my hectic life! Especially when I start wondering when the last time I took a breath was!! Maybe it's just me, but the last time I checked, breathing was essential to living. Hmmm just a thought. Between piano lessons, piano practice, teaching full time, working on my MAT, family life, church - including my duties as church pianist, working out, etc., etc., I don't have much time. Get the picture?? If not, come follow me around for a few days and I think you will get it real fast!!

Recently, a fellow teacher from school shared a devotional with us that went something along the lines of, "Do you ever feel like you are on a train and it is whizzing by so fast that you can't even enjoy the scenery? Well, take heart, because you are not on the train - you ARE the train. So, stop and take the time you need - make choices about where you go and how fast." I thought this was an excellent point - just one problem - I don't think my brakes work anymore!!